Smiling Faces

Contrary to popular belief, being a guide is not an easy venture. Dealing with high water, leaky boats, section closures and difficult clients. One recent guest pushed my patience and my gag reflex to the breaking point. An Iowa corn farmer, who's name will remain unknown for security purposes, consistently found something to complain about and displayed an attitude resembling that of sanitation engineer pulling the night shift at an all you can eat shellfish convention. He not only refused to follow directions, which were conveyed with the utmost respect; the kind of respect that Iowa's stealthiest corn grower has apparently come to demand from spouse,offspring and compadre. After three days of putting on a smile and doing everything in my power to keep this pleasantly pissed person from threatening my life and the lives of those in passing boats, convinced that every other boat on the water was poaching "his" water, I was finally greeted with a smile.